A few years ago I watched a child of mine deal with rejection. I can share this because my boys have had SO MANY crushes you'll never know who I'm talking about... ;)
He had his heart set on a girl that for whatever reason needed to be chased. She wasn't good at settling into a relationship. She didn't understand how to. She would tease and run, tease and run.... bottom line she didn't know how to love back. He thought it was all because of him... It wrecked his self esteem and he spent a while bouncing back. I told him that eventually he'd find the one that didn't need to be chased... he'd find the one who was comfortable enough in herself... to stay.
I truly believed the words I told him. I'd watched too many "pursuits". I had so many family members and friends who had spent years trying to SAVE relationships...It never worked out well for most.
Then I watched one particular woman I know fight tooth and nail for a love she'd poured her whole life into. It wasn't just a marriage she was trying to rescue... it was a person. He had lost himself. She carefully did all she could to help him find his way back to the man he was before pain got a hold of him. I watched another woman I love dearly fight for her son. The further he fell the harder she fought too.
See sometimes relationships break down because PEOPLE break down. People get lost. They lose themselves in struggle, self destruction, could have been's, if onlys, and addictions.
We watch the unraveling... and instead of being a bystander, LOVE steps in. And we fight. Most of the time they don't want us to chase them. That's the shame talking. That's the breakdown talking. That's the lost heart talking.
Yet we pursue them anyway. Because that's what love does. I think about Jesus. Whether you believe in him or not.... his story is breathtaking. His love was so vast and wide he pursued even the hearts who nailed him to a cross and forgave them in his last breath. He traded his life... for theirs.
I hope I can love people like that.
All that to say... this song was written to celebrate the women who love the unloveable...who chase the broken hearts. The mamas who fight for children lost inside addiction... the wives who chase the men who break them down because they are completely broken themselves.
I like to celebrate the not giving up part... even though circumstances do sometimes require it. I am full aware there are times in life we have to say goodbye. Sometimes the broken people take us further into the bowels of brokenness and we find the only person that can save them... is themselves. Their rising again can't depend on us... so we quietly stand in the background... and wait. For the rising again part... hoping one day it finally comes. Not for us... but for them...
Cheers to all the Damn Good Women... loving with everything you have... trading your soul to buy theirs back... Your heart is gold. Love the broken.... go ahead... it's a beautiful thing... love them until you know it's over... and until it is... keep using that heart of yours. You are the spitting image of love. A heart worn out but still beating.
Lyrics from the song..
"I'm a damn good woman
Im not done loving you yet
You’d have to sell your soul
before I let go
then I'd trade mine
just to buy you back
I don’t understand
why I choose to stand by a man
Who breaks me down
Guess I'm a damn good woman"
**You can hear a soundbyte on instagram :)